30. Ottobre 2011: A Medley: For Sentimental Reasons, Tenderly, Autumn Leaves

I’ve decided to take a quick break from studying about the Medici as patrons of the arts. It is freezing in our house now because, well, it’s the end of October and Florence has a 3000€ fine for anyone who turns their heat on before November first. So our reward for finishing this exam on Tuesday will, hopefully, be to come home to warmth and coziness. Right now, it’s generally colder inside than it is outside. Even my Minnesotan roommate is cold!

Tonight I attended the Vespers service at San Miniato al Monte. The church is huge but Vespers is held in the smallest part of the church, underneath the main level in a space that feels a cozy but eerie—sort of like a crypt. There were five rows of very small pews but the area for the priests was about as big as the area for the congregation. The priests sat in a caged area with wooden stalls and a ceiling that looked like the ceiling of the Chiesa San Francesca di Assisi diluted by about a thousand. A priest was actually sitting next to me during the service and kindly let me look at his program. The chanting was beautiful and echoed gloriously off the walls of our little space. About halfway through the service my priest neighbor took out his cell phone and began fiddling with it. Huh. But when the incense came out, Kari and I (she is allergic to incense, I am asthmatic) took that as our cue to exit! They were about to take communion, anyways and, neither of us being Catholic, we were not allowed to participate.

The view from San Miniato al Monte was beautiful. It is finally looking like fall here so the panorama has little splashes of color here and there. We also got to see the panorama lit up at night which was quite a sight and is pretty indescribable. As we waited for our bus back to the city, the yellow leaves of a nearby tree were slowly falling under a yellow streetlamp. The whole evening felt so spiritual and was an incredible break from studying.

I’m not sure how many observers understand quite how lonely it can be studying abroad. There have been some tough moments along this trip for all of us. This evening reminded me of a poem that has been playing in the back of my head ever since I first felt that despair of loneliness at sleepaway camp when I was in the seventh grade. I think that no matter who you are or where you are on life’s journey, the idea that this poem presents is helpful. If you are not religious, then change the Lord to a spirit, to Mother Earth, to the wind, whatever works for you. Because we are never alone.

Footprints in the Sand

One night I had a dream.

I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord

Across the sky flashed scenes from my life.

For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand.

One belonging to me and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of my life flashed before me,

I looked back at the footprints in the sand.

I noticed that many times along the path of my life

There was only one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed

That during the low periods of my life,

When I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints,

so I said to the Lord,

“Lord you said that if I followed you,

You'd walk with me all the way.

But I have noticed that

during the most troublesome times in my life

There is only one set of footprints in the sand.

I don't understand why, when I needed you most, you would leave me.

The Lord replied,

“My precious child, I Love you

And I would never leave you.

During your times of trial and suffering

When you see only one set of footprints,

it was then that I carried you.”